Good Luck Charm {My Infertility Journey}

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For some, St. Patrick’s Day might be an excuse to have some extra alcohol, host a party and wear a lot of ridiculous gaudy green attire. But for me, in 2019, it’s the day I learned about my greatest good luck charm: my daughter.

For years, my husband and I tried to start a family.

charm

We prayed and hoped that we would someday have a child. We experienced two miscarriages and I endured countless tests, medications, needles and agonizing days. I wondered if this dream of mine would ever be a reality. I wondered if the pain and sacrifice would ever be worth it.

On March 17, 2019, after four years of infertility, I received a phone call from my doctor telling me I was pregnant and that for once, my numbers looked good. I took a deep breath and felt a sense of cautious optimism. I wasn’t relieved because, honestly, so many things could still go wrong, but for the moment, I had some optimism and the sense that I forever had a new good luck charm.

My journey to motherhood, of course, gave me my daughter, but it also gave me a new understanding of loss, love and sacrifice. It gave me a new compassion for the women waiting to be a mother. It gave me a new appreciation for my own mother and her years of sacrifice. It taught me to persevere because the next nine months to get my daughter in my arms would be far from easy. It taught me that the best good luck charms are worth the wait.

To the women (some who are dear friends of mine) who are waiting for their good luck charm, for their miracle, for their good news phone call, I see you. I stand with you. I am here for you. It’s an often long and difficult road to navigate alone. You are not alone. You are worthy and deserving to be a mother.

Your good luck charm might not be revealed to you on St. Patrick’s Day like mine, but know that it’s coming.