A Love Letter to My Plus-Size Mommas

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My Dearest Plus-Size Mommas,

I love you! You are magical. You may not believe me every day, but you are! And because I know you don’t hear it nearly enough, I deeply admire the dedication, love, and understanding you bring to your family and our motherhood community! 

Being a plus-size mom myself, I have often felt there are times within my motherhood journey where I have not been included.

I almost didn’t take maternity photos because I had a friend say they understood why I may not want to take maternity photos, “being plus-size.” 

I have also had several instances where friends and colleagues, while discussing pregnancy, postpartum health, body image, and baby health, made it clear they assumed these items are not important to me.

I’m here to tell you – like every plus-size mom – they absolutely are. 

I have struggled with my plus-size status most of my life. I am used to the generic assumptions and biases associated with being a plus-size woman. Assumptions that I am not hard-working, less fun, or I wouldn’t want to participate in activities because of my size. However, it never occurred to me that these types of biases would also bleed into my role as a mother and caregiver, especially when the bias is coming from other moms. I love being a part of Club Mom and wasn’t expecting the negative assumptions perpetuated in the harmonious circle of motherhood. To me, motherhood means we are there to love each other, support, and lift each other up when we need it most. 

There were many times during my pregnancy and preparing for my son’s arrival that plus-size friendly products were not readily available. There were many well-intended suggestions from friends followed by, “Oh! But it may not fit you,” or “It may not work for you…” 

Because moments of exclusion are so prominent and discouraging, I have found power in instances of inclusion. Being included, recognized, and seen in a space is extremely uplifting, empowering, and the vibrant light I need as a mom! One of the happiest parts of my motherhood journey has been experiencing moments of inclusion, especially when it’s businesses and products that are striving to be inclusive.

These are the top 10 things that make my heart extra happy and give light to my daily grind as a plus-size mom.

Top 10 Plus-Size Friendly Products

  1. “Mom & Me” clothing with plus-size options. One of my favorite shops has some fun styles and t-shirts up to 4XL.
  1. Extra-long adjustable straps on backpacks and diaper bags are amazing. My favorite is Itzy Ritzy’s Boss Backpack. The straps are adjustable to accommodate both plus-size and petite silhouettes. The backpack works great for my husband and me, but also fits our son’s tiny grandmothers when they are visiting.
  1. The nursing tanks and bras are comfortable and the fit is great! 
  1. This activewear has made outings to metro parks and pumpkin patches a breeze. I highly recommend going down a slide while wearing them; I have never slid so fast in my life!
  2. This wrap fit well and was comfortable for me and my baby.
  3. The Boppy is wonderful for nursing and playtime with your baby. I used it on my side vs. the front part of my torso. It was perfect for supporting my arm and resting my baby on. This was one I was told may not work for me – but it did! Don’t let anyone tell you it won’t work for you.
  4. My entire pregnancy uniform was Torrid leggings and a crew neck sweater.
  5. Options for plus-size family shirts and Halloween costumes.
  6. I love a good sweater! These men’s crew sweaters are identical to women’s crew sweaters for half the price. The pink tax is real, y’all. Fight it when you can.
  7. For ultra comfort, protection, and seduction, these intimates do it all! I always feel comfortable, beautiful, and confident in their bras and panties. 

To all of the plus-size Momma out there, I love you! You are doing a phenomenal job. Remember to live in the moment, know how awesome you are, and keep rockin’ motherhood! 

Love Your Fellow Plus-Size Momma, 

Brittney Paxton