Never Have I Ever {Parent Edition}


Life as a parent is certainly an adventure! Before our first child, I had visions of how things would look, how my kids would act and all the fun we would have. What did I not expect, however, were all the surprises thrown our way.

Recently, I saw a post on Facebook that was titled, “Never Have I Ever… As a Parent of a Baby.” 

have I ever

If you’ve not played this game, you give yourself a point for everything you haven’t done.  For this particular game, my score was one. Meaning I’d done everything on it except one thing. I don’t remember what it was, but I do remember one of the items was catching puke. Yup, we’ve all been there, right?!

Well, I got to thinking about all the random things I never thought I’d encounter as a parent. So here’s my “Never Have I Ever: Parent Edition.”

  • Found a pile of hidden hair that had been cut off a kid’s head.
  • Told a child to stop drinking the bath water.
  • Pretended to not be scared when presented with a random insect.
  • Eaten something that was made by tiny hands that did not go together (ex: fruit leather and chocolate sprinkles).
  • Secretly tossed toys/artwork/clothes hoping no one would ever notice.
  • Watched a child make a frog dance.
  • Hosed mud off a kid in the backyard.
  • Mopped up a bathroom floor with a towel.
  • Considered a dip in the pool close enough to a shower.
  • Asked “What is that?” when looking at a substance somewhere.
  • Hollered “You need to wipe and flush!” as a kid darts out of a bathroom.
  • Taken a child to urgent care because they had something stuck up their nose.
  • Actually, go to the local children’s urgent care so many times you start to wonder exactly how much money you have to give to the hospital to earn a plaque on the wall as a sponsor (I’m still not sure, but I think we’re close!).
  • Walk around for who knows how long with a Capri Sun straw wrapper stuck to your shoe.
  • Been so scared for your child, you’ve cried.
  • Been so happy for your child, you’ve cried.
  • Been so tired because of your child, you’ve cried.
  • Literally cried for no reason at all.
  • Accidentally gave the special blue folder you bought for one kid to another and the kid forgot but found it after the other kid already wrote their name on it and had a meltdown and now you’re just hoping Target hasn’t sold out of all the special blue folders.
  • Said the wrong kid’s name.
  • Had to pause and think to remember a birthdate.
  • Told the kids it was too late to have dessert so now you’re sneaking and eating ice cream in bed.
  • Spent a milestone wedding anniversary night at a kid’s elementary choir concert and a middle school parent orientation.

So how many points do you have? I’m definitely at zero here. What is something you’d add to this list? It’s always something, right?!