Disagreeing Appropriately {A Valuable Lesson Learned}


On a recent trip to the park, I was talking to a mother of two boys and she called them and told them that they had 5 minutes left to play before they were to go.

Her one son, probably around 3 or so, came up to her and whispered something to her, and she said, “Alright, tell me why.” He whispered something else and she said, “I can agree with that. You have 10 more minutes to play instead.”

I inquired about what had just taken place and she shared with me that she had just been to a homeschool conference where they taught her some new techniques to use with her boys.

I may be a 50-year-old momma, but you are never too old to learn new things, so I said teach me your ways.


Her son had come up and respectfully said that he wanted to disagree appropriately with her about only having 5 minutes left to play. She replied, “Tell me why,” and he went on to explain that he was playing with these new boys (my sons) and they were having so much fun that he wanted 5 extra minutes to play. She agreed.

It was an amazing exchange, no raised voices, no yelling; it was beautiful.

She explained to me that teaching her kids how to disagree appropriately was important to her. She knows they won’t agree with people on everything, but giving them this tool will help them as they get older.

Can I get an amen?!

This was life-changing for me. We teach our kids so many other things of importance. Disagreeing appropriately should be right up there with please and thank you.

So thank you, new friend, for your wisdom at the park. You are never too old to learn and you taught me a valuable lesson that I’m passing on to my boys about disagreeing appropriately.

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Hey local mommas! I grew up in Centerville, but I now live in Wilmington with my husband Tony. Together we have 6 kids, Joe, and his wife Allison, Austin, and his wife Hannah, Sydney and her husband Hayden, Andrew and his wife Lauren and our littles, Max and Eli. Did I mention we are a little nuts starting over with this parenting thing when we are 45+? We are officially adding new titles to our names in 2022- Tiki and Jeep (our version of Grandma and Grandpa). My husband and I are both ministers, and we get to work together in a local church. We were both married before and brought our families together in 2010. After a few years of marriage we felt God's leading for us to adopt. We added Max to our family in 2014 and Eli joined us in 2017, our quiver is officially full! Blending our family has been an adventure! Add some ex-spouses and two birth mommas and we have ourselves a crazy crew! Coffee is my love language. The beach is my happy place and I long to have my toes in the sand. I love being part of the team at Dayton Mom Collective.


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