Bedtime sucks. Seriously.
Our oldest is 9. We should totally have this down by now. But, somewhere along the line, I failed. I read all the books. Tried all the advice. Stuck to the routine. Rubbed their cute, wiggly little feet with lavender. Made sure they had favorite blankets, night lights, each other, a bedtime story, cuddles. Moved bedtime up, moved it back. Cut out all the naps. Prayed with them. Sang songs. Offered words of affirmation. Less screen time during the day. More active movement and brain stimulation. Literally, whatever anyone said *might* just work. Nothing has. At least not consistently.
Their dad cuddles with them and has gotten considerably better at his storytelling efforts; this is great news for me because prior to this, they told him, in not so many words, that he needed to up his game or it would always have to be me. Oh, joy. (I do a really amazing shadow puppet, though, and I also have a series about dogs that I made up. The girls adore them, so maybe that is why I was preferred for a while.)
Truly, I thought it was just us.
The more I talk to people, the more I realize… it isn’t! Not at all! Apparently, bedtime is a difficult time for a lot of families. I know there are huge advocates out there for co-sleeping. And, I completely get that. But, I can’t commit to it, mamas. I simply cannot. I am a light sleeper. The tiniest wiggle or noise wakes me. It is a lot to ask me to share a room with anyone, some nights, even my husband. In fact, a dear friend once told me that the secret to how great he slept was that he and the wife he adored had separate master rooms. This shocked me, but some nights, I get it.
Needless to say, I adore my people. Kids and husband. And ridiculous dog. (The dog never sleeps with me, by the way. I have my limits). I also adore my quality sleep and feeling rested enough to tackle the day alongside them! One of the girls has even figured out how to sneak into our room nearly every day in the wee hours of the morning. I really love cuddling, so if she is quiet and doesn’t “starfish,” I am all for it. It is the actual getting them to sleep part that is so hard.
So mamas, hit me with your magic advice. Tried and true. what actually worked for you? Until then, you can find me rereading all those articles from experts looking for whatever gem it is I may have missed and wondering, why is bedtime SO hard?
Melatonin, cool dark room, and QUIET. No stories or talking or other stimulation. Do all that before. Once they are in bed, still and quiet. Maybe a soft, soothing meditation that involves being still and listening. But nothing else.
Thank you, Wendy! ♡
Girl. We hear you.
Literally the last two months we have felt like failures as parents, primarily at bedtime! Our pediatrician recommended the book “it’s Never Too Late to Sleep Train”. Currently reading through that.
In the last few weeks, we have changed up our “bedtime routine”. We’ve been starting bedtime an hour earlier — all electronics off, quiet cuddles, and the 4 of us (both mom and dad too) cram in to Ryder’s full size bed and read 4-6 books in the dark with a flashlight. Then off to their own rooms! For whatever reason, that little bit of extra love and undivided attention has seemed (knock on wood) to do us a decent amount of good.
That said… every night is different. And my kids are lucky they’re so damn cute. 😂
♡ They are SO cute.😂🥰
Haha my daughter is 2.5 and I feel like since she turned 2 we have been going through 2-3 hours of going to sleep every night. It’s ridiculous enough I asked my doctor and she suggested a low dose of melatonin a couple nights in a row to reset her sleep schedule- we tried it and it still didn’t work.
Just solidarity sister!!
Meghan, no doubt. We are definitely not alone. ♡😂
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