This topic has weighed heavy on my heart for some time now. It is something I have struggled with immensely over the years and feel completely silly about. I usually have to dig deep within to even allow myself the confidence to form the right words. And I would not for one second say it is because I am prideful, no. I would say it has more to do with not wanting to put others out. I never want to burden others.
Wondering what I am referring to?
The ability, or in my case the inability, to ask for help. I know, it seems so simple, so human. We all need help here and there. We could all use a shoulder to lean on once in a while, words of comfort, or even just a hug. I have personally been on the giving end of this equation multiple times. Being able to make others feel loved and appreciated brings me so much happiness. I enjoy giving my all to ensure that my peers are encouraged. However, when it comes to my own moments of needing help, I am the first to shy away and hide.
In fact, I will wait until the very last second if I can. Holding my tongue until there is absolutely nothing else I can do. In recent years, asking the people close to me has become slightly easier but only because more often then not, it has to do with my kids or my health, and even then, I will usually let my health suffer a bit if it means I do not look like a complete failure at life. If it means I am not imposing on others.
And when I finally reach out, I feel nothing but guilt and defeat for not being able to do it all on my own. For not being able to handle the stresses of life. Because there is nothing worse, to me, then trying to push fierceness onto others all the while feeling like a fraud.
Then it hit me.
It is totally okay to ask for help. To ask for kind words when the days are rough. It is more than okay to put yourself out there because more times than not, our friends and family are open and willing to help when and where they can. When it comes to needing a hand, or feeling lost and needing a friend, it is normal and perfectly acceptable to reach out.
And this message goes out to anyone feeling like they are exhausted from constantly having to show strength. You are not weak for wanting to throw in the towel sometimes. And you are certainly not a failure for wanting to vent about all of the ups and downs that life can send our way.
You are setting an example for what real courage looks like. Life is hard. Parenting is hard. Dealing with health issues is hard. When the perfect storm erupts, we cannot be expected to weather it alone. So, ask for help. Because you are allowed to and it is more than okay!
