How many times and how many blogs can you possibly read about how to find the proper balance?
I, myself, have read many; how to balance life, work, friends, school, kids, husbands, families …Oh My Word – I am getting tired now just thinking about it all! So many blogs say…
“It’s okay to be a mess and not have balance…just be okay with your life as it is.” Perhaps they don’t know that my life is a HOT FREAKING MESS?
I think ultimately it is about finding your balance. I know that mine changes from day to day, week to week, heck even sometimes hour to hour. At different times my scale tips different ways. My children, of course, get the biggest arm of this scale. Being a mother has taught me many things (yes mom, I know you told me that a LONG time ago).
The biggest lesson I have learned over the years is that – the moment I am in now – I will never get back.
Which is why, when possible, I take each and every moment I have to cherish my children and do so. I sit on the floor to play games, read books, do puzzles, color (NEVER inside the lines), or just snuggle and watch cartoons. Don’t get me wrong, there are times plenty of times, where if I hear my child’s voice ask me for one more thing – I.MAY.HAVE.A.MENTAL.BREAKDOWN.
If you are honest with yourself, you know that this is true for all mothers (and of course dads too). The oh-so-close mental breakdown. This is when the scale tips to “me time” or “friend time.” I do all the things typical mom’s do to escape from life a little; shop, Starbucks, pedicures, Drive. Yes, drive. Alone, radio loud, and me singing without interruption (if your child can talk, you know what I mean).
As a new mom 5-plus years ago I use to feel SO guilty having these moments and doing something FUN. But I have found over time that these moments refresh me and they are what make me a better, more engaged, mom ready to build the best lego castle EVER!
Family time comes and goes with events, same for school (PTO meetings, planned events, conferences, etc) and work. Yes work – I have to have money to waste spend on my kids and myself, right? Last is the husband: “the forgotten one” as I refer to him sometimes. We often think of ourselves as ships. Attempting to keep ourselves afloat, docking together every now and again to remind ourselves why we chose this.
In the end it’s all the arms working together – the balance, the ups and downs, the good, the bad, the ugly and the perfect.
Not true perfect (not that I have any idea what that could even be); but MY perfect.
That is where I will leave you – find your perfect – your balance – allow it to grow and bend and flex and change and when all else fails – take a bubble bath with a glass of wine and try again tomorrow.
