When the answer just HAS to be “No”

In recent years, there has been this trend of saying “Yes” to things in life. “Yes” to wearing the bikini, “Yes” to last-minute trips, “Yes” to date nights with your husband, the list goes on and on. While this movement is all well and good, I’m here to tell you there is a distinct beauty and feeling of freedom in saying “No.”

The last 12 months or so, I got caught up in allllll the “yes” saying. Did some amazing situations come from it? Definitely. Have I made friends I otherwise wouldn’t have? Yup! Was I able to break out of my shell and live like I hadn’t in a long time? YES! But on the other hand, I was also running myself into the ground.

My year of “yes” also turned into one of the worst depression/anxiety years I’ve had in a long time. My planner was filling up months in advance, my kids were starting to notice I wasn’t home as much, I spent unnecessary funds on outfits and accessories because I didn’t want to wear the same thing twice to different events. My husband also started a new job last year that took him away from the home more often, leaving me home alone more than ever in our marriage and added to my feelings of just wanting to get out.

All of these “yes” situations were ruining my life.

We just returned from our family summer vacation where I had quite a bit of time to really look at my life and make some hard-hitting decisions. I’m going to be saying “NO” a lot more as summer turns to fall and the holiday season kicks off. My focus is shifting to family, work and friends in a big way and taking the focus off of others things like social media, local events, and so forth. I’m not saying I’m going into full-on hermit mode because that’s just not me (most of the time) but instead, I’m focusing on the things I’ve worked hard for and currently have right here in front of me.

Please don’t take this as me telling you saying “yes” is bad because it totally isn’t. What I hope someone out there takes from this is that you don’t ALWAYS have to say “yes.” Sprinkle some “noes” around y’all; you may be surprised by the feelings they create, too.