Thoughts from a C-Section Mama

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Wanna hear something crazy? I’m a proud mom to two beautiful kiddos, neither of whom is adopted -and I’ve never had the experience of labor. Never. Not even a little.

When my first baby was born, I was only 33 weeks along—and my water broke spontaneously. I was far enough along in my pregnancy that after waiting 48 hours I could receive two doses of steroids to help baby’s lung development. It was decided it was time for the baby to come because the risk of infection was greater than the risks of a preterm delivery. My doctor offered me the choice of an induction or a c-section. After some checking, my doctor advised me that my body was showing no signs of being ready for labor, so I decided to go the c-section route.

Because of my history of pre-term delivery and high blood pressure during pregnancy, I knew that baby number 2 was almost certainly going to be a repeat c-section. Sure enough, she was, as I needed to deliver at 38 weeks with baby number 2.

I’m not what you would describe as a “crunchy” Mom.  I had always intended to have an epidural during birth – I had no dreams of a natural delivery or anything like that. In fact, like many mamas, I was pretty terrified of the idea of being in labor. However, I never had the opportunity to experience it at all, and while I don’t spend a lot of time thinking about the probable torture that I missed out on enduring, it does occasionally give me pause. Especially when I’m sitting in a room full of other moms talking about their labor and delivery experiences.

I recently was at a dinner with a group of my fellow Dayton Moms Blog contributors, and they were all discussing their various labor and delivery experiences. I sat in silence and listened. What else could I do? I truly enjoyed hearing their tales and laughing at their experiences (though I’m sure most of them weren’t laughing when they were living through it). At the end of the conversation, I said, “Well, I had 2 c-sections, so I don’t have anything to add here.” It was the first time that I’d really felt sort of sad about the experience of laboring that I’d missed out on.

At the end of the day, it’s not something that I spend time dwelling on, but it is a small piece of motherhood that I feel sad to have not experienced. Regardless, I’m proud of my c-section scar, because it is my reminder of my two sweet girls being brought safely into this world. I will always have the memories of my c-section experience to share with my husband. (And I do have a funny story about having to wait 8 hours before my doctor could perform my surgery with baby #2, because it was an unexpected delivery and I had just eaten a Chick-Fil-A sandwich immediately before landing in Labor and Delivery.)

What I don’t have is stories of my husband holding my hand through contractions, or waiting on my doctor to rush to the hospital and hoping she’d make it in time for me to push. I can’t tell you how many hours I was in labor or how many pushes it took me to deliver my children. But my birth story is unique, and it resulted in my two healthy beautiful girls, and I wouldn’t trade that for the world.

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Kim Estess
Kim is a mom to Cece (June 2014) and Abby (May 2017). She works as an attorney practicing in the areas of estate planning, probate, and elder law. She's been married to her husband Adam since 2012 and lives with her family in Centerville. When she isn't working or mom-ing, Kim enjoys running, working out via Peloton, eating and drinking her way through Dayton, and playing golf.

3 COMMENTS

  1. Birth is miraculous and I love hearing your stories even if they aren’t the “traditional” kind. Also, Chick-Fil-A is life…totally warrants an 8 hour wait!

  2. I love hearing about any form of birth- there is no way that being a c-section Mama means you didn’t deliver your baby! So many people see a c-section as the easy way out, but it’s not! You gave your girlies life and you are a wonderful Mama for that!

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