At some point or another, I blinked and realized that I had become a real life adult.
I’m sure it probably happened at the moment when my first daughter was born and I suddenly was responsible for someone besides myself, but I don’t know that I necessarily realized it then. Most days, I still don’t feel like the adult in the room.
Either way, my reality today is that I’m a 32-year-old wife and mama to two small kids. It’s my responsibility as a mother to behave like a responsible adult and make sure that my family is protected in any circumstance that life may throw our way. I need to take care of myself and my family to the best of my ability.
It helps that I am an estate planning attorney by trade – I’ve had professional opportunities to learn about the importance of legal and financial planning to protect my family. These are two important facets of adulting, but they don’t make up the entire picture.
To me, successful adulting boils down to these five main categories:
Have your estate plan in order. I can’t stress enough the importance of estate planning for young families. I will tell anyone who will listen, again and again, that they need to plan for the worst case scenario. I like to tell people that we plan for the worst and pray for the best, but we always have to be prepared. An estate plan will allow you to do just that. At the bare minimum, every mama needs to have a Last Will and Testament, a General Durable Power of Attorney for finances, and a Health Care Power of Attorney. A Living Will and a Revocable Living Trust may also be points of conversation. You can read more about these documents and what they all entail here, but the primary takeaway here should be this: you need to have a plan. Who will make decisions for you if you get sick and can’t make them yourself? Who would have custody of your children if you die? These are terrible things to think about, but it can be an even more terrible mess if you fail to plan. Seek out an experiences attorney and get your affairs in order. The peace of mind you’ll feel at the completion of the process will be worth every penny.
Evaluate your insurance needs. I am not a financial professional of any kind and I don’t sell insurance. I would never dream of telling you how much insurance you should purchase or what kind you should have in place. However, I am a huge believer that every mom should have life insurance. (And so should your spouse for that matter!) If you passed away tomorrow, I’m sure you would hate to see your family crippled by financial worries while they grieve. Life insurance provides the peace of mind of knowing that if you die, your family is going to be okay financially. Again, speaking to a professional is key in this regard. An insurance professional will be able to help you evaluate what expenses your family might need to cover in the event of your unexpected death. Consider having enough life insurance that your family could pay off your mortgage and any other debts, as well as provide a nest egg for your children’s future education.
Consider your personal finances. Personal finances are exactly that – they’re personal. This tip is going to look different for everyone. For some, the starting point might be paying off debt. For another, maybe it’s time to build up a comfortable savings account. Maybe the goal is college savings for your kids. Maybe it’s saving for retirement. Whatever your current financial situation looks like, it’s important to be aware of it and have goals for the future. Your goal could be as simple as cutting out Starbucks and putting $25 a month into savings or it could be something bigger, like funding a 529 account for your kids. If you have the means, consider making an appointment with a financial planning professional to truly evaluate and maximize your long term savings strategies.
Make your health a priority. We’ve all heard it before but I’m going to say it again–we can’t care for others if we aren’t first caring for ourselves. End of sentence. It’s so easy as moms to get so tied up in our kids that we forget about ourselves, but it’s imperative that we make our own health a priority. Visit your primary care physician for an annual wellness exam. See the dentist every six months for a cleaning. Have your annual exam with your gynecologist. Stay on top of self-breast exams. Schedule your mammogram or colonoscopy or other recommended procedures on the timetable that your physicians suggest. Don’t let your health take a backseat to the rest of your family. Your kiddos need a healthy mama in their lives. Don’t take your health for granted.
Practice daily self care. Start by making it a goal to drink half your body weight in ounces of water each and every day. This is the easiest form of self care I know, but it’s also one of the most neglected. Next, find a way to move your body every day – and make it something you enjoy. For me, this looks like waking up at 5 a.m. to attend Fit Chicks Bootcamp or meet a friend for a run. For you, it might be something as simple as taking a walk with the kids after dinner every night. Whatever it is, find something you enjoy, and make it a priority. Beyond that, self care is going to look different for every mom. Maybe it’s taking a bubble bath before bed. Maybe it’s getting a full 8 hours of sleep every night. Maybe it’s drinking a cup of coffee every morning before the rest of the house wakes up. Find something that fills your metaphorical cup, and make it a priority, each and every day. You are worth it.
Adulting is going to look different to everyone – but to me, this is a list full of important responsbilities. If you haven’t considered all of these things already, you certainly aren’t alone. I hope this insight into some of the less-than-fun adult responsibilities out there provides some food for thought and encourages you to start checking some of these boxes if you haven’t already.
 and make sure that my family is protected in any circumstance that life may throw our way. I need to take care of myself and my family to the best of my ability.){kind=link}