Potty Training: the right of parenthood passage that no one truly enjoys.
A quick search online will yield roughly 18 million different ways to approach this battlefield. Throw in a few highly acclaimed books for good measure, and you’ve got yourself one endless snowball of confusion, am I right!?
Having successfully trained our first son, my husband and I decided to train our second using the same methods because, well, it worked the first time around, so why not try it again? Seriously… That’s our logic. Ha! Since these tricks seemed to work so well for us, I thought I’d offer up my two-cents to any parents out there that might be desperate to try something new.
Timing
There are SO many different timelines to choose from when considering potty training. You can gradually ease your child into it over the course of a few weeks or months, or dive head-first into the potty training deep-end and get ‘er done in three days. No matter how long or short of a method you choose, eventually your child will use the potty (even if it might seem like that day will never come).
Personally, I wanted to get it done, so my husband and I chose the 3-day method. If you do this too, just make sure your spouse or a trusted friend or family member is on board with you to potty train and then decide together upon 3 days during which you will do nothing but focus on potty training. I know that’s difficult sometimes with work schedules, but if you can swing it, do it. During those 3 days, devote ALL of your attention to the child. The idea is to be near them at all times so when they show signs of needing to go potty (or begin to have an accident) you can immediately swoop them up and bring them to the potty. Spoiler alert: there will still be some accidents after 3 days, BUT if you are super vigilant during those 3 days, going in the potty will absolutely “click” in their brains.
Get rid of ALL of the diapers
Yep, all of them. Give them away and never look back. Make it clear to your child that they are a big kid now and big kids don’t wear diapers. Save one or two to have them ceremoniously throw them away the morning you begin training if you think it might help to drive home the point for them, but ultimately do whatever you need to do to get them out of the house. This will prevent old (unused) diapers from becoming a crutch for them and you.
New Undies & “Warm Shorts”
There will be accidents. Arm yourself with plenty of underwear so you’re not having to constantly do laundry while praying that the last pair currently on your kid won’t get dirty. We have about 24 pairs. It sounds ridiculous, but you’ll be thankful later! Also, while I personally think that any type of training pants or “pull-ups” tend to confuse kids, I do purchase a pack before beginning and refer to them as “warm shorts” instead of “pull-ups” or “training pants.” I only ever put them on the child for nap time, bedtime, or when leaving the house (but we stay at the house for those first 3 days).
This might sound ridiculous too, but I put them on *over* the underwear. This way, instead of the wetness only being absorbed by the training pants, the child will actually feel the underwear getting wet first, which helps them to be more aware of when they have an accident. If they stay dry, I just reuse them over & over again. This silly little idea was born out of my desire to train with underwear while avoiding the risk of messy sheets and car seats. I truthfully don’t even know why I started calling them “warm shorts,” but I vaguely remember coming up with that term on the fly when I wanted to make the distinction to my oldest son that they weren’t a diaper and weren’t meant to be used as such, they were just meant to keep his booty warm while he slept or while we were out… yeah, moms tell their kids strange things sometimes, but it worked so I went with it and still do!
Potty Gear
Obviously, before you get started, you need to equip yourself with all of the right gear. Find a potty seat to put on your toilet that actually fits your toilet – the first one I bought was the wrong shape for my seats! Don’t make my mistake – check before you begin! A step stool is also helpful to have on hand, especially once they really get the hang of things and can go potty by themselves. My other absolute must-have is a potty chair for the car. I cannot even begin to tell you how many times that glorious little potty has saved us from an accident when no other options were in sight! My personal favorite is The Potette. Instead of buying their disposable bags, you can use grocery bags lined with a paper towel to prevent splashing. (Just be sure to check the grocery bags for holes first… I made that mistake only once… ok, maybe twice.)
Rewards
This is another scenario in which the “you know your child best” rule applies. Stickers, candy, little trinkets, whatever… If it works, use it! BUT only give the reward when the potty is successfully used. Even if your child starts by having an accident but finishes doing their business in the toilet, that’s a success! Reward, cheer, clap, & praise! Eventually, they’ll catch on, start to recognize the signals their little bodies are giving them that it’s time to go, and they’ll make it in time. Your job is just to do whatever it takes to encourage that process to “click” in their minds.
Use Your Words Wisely
Instead of saying, “Do you need to go potty?” a million times just say, “Let me know if you need to go potty.” Most two-year-olds have a hunger for power. Making that statement puts the power in their hands. You’ll still be saying it constantly, and there will be (LOTS) of accidents as you swoop them up to bring them to the potty to finish, but it’s likely to yield more compliance from them since it makes them think they’re in control. Also, try your best to keep your cool. Trust me, I know how annoying it can be to wipe up urine for the hundredth time or dump poop out of underwear again, but do your very best to stay calm and positive. Remind them that the goal is to use the potty and never punish them for having an accident (or twenty). While most two-year-olds do love a good power trip, they also seem to really enjoy helping out – just get them to help clean up the mess.
Do Whatever It Takes
If none of the tips I suggested sound good to you, that’s more than ok! I’m certainly no expert, but I am a big believer in doing whatever it takes and whatever works for you and your family! I just wanted to share these things that worked for me in hopes that maybe you can use one or two of these little tricks to make your potty training experience a little bit better too. Good luck, friends! Just like many adventures in parenting, potty training isn’t glamorous, but we all have t0 crawl through the trenches. Unfortunately, this just happens to be one of the stinkier trenches.
